The Ambiguities of 'Home'
'Home'... Having just been 'home', and having just returned 'home', 'home' seems to be an ambiguous word for us, a concept in flux. I guess that we're beginning to think about this 'home' thing more as we think about where we'll be 10-12 months from now. We know that our lease is up in 9 months, which has got us thinking about the things we'll miss from here (friends, food, football, warm winters), as well as the exciting opportunities that lie ahead.
Obviously, Niagara is 'home' for us. That's were most of our family members and many of our friends are. That's the community we grew up in, the community that invested in us and in which we invested ourselves. It's comfortable to return from an absence and we look forward to being back.
But in some ways, Niagara is no longer 'home'. We've lived here for a year now; a year of developing a routine, a year of finding a comfort zone, a year of forming ties to a community, a year of building relationships, a year of creating a 'home'. In many ways, this has become 'home' for us. And although we look forward to leaving periodically (just as we did when living in St. Catharines), we also look forward to returning from an absence.
This is the place where we feel purposeful and Niagara is a place where others have been purposeful without us. This is the place where we've experienced significant growth and Niagara is a place where others have experienced significant growth without us. But changing 'homes' doesn't happen so easily. One home doesn't seem to replace another; College Station could never 'replace' Niagara. It's more like we're accumulating 'homes'.
But, in some other sense, it seems like we might be shedding 'homes'. The longer we are away from Niagara, the deeper into 'home' limbo it moves. What I mean is, Niagara will always be 'home' in some sense, but in another sense, it's beginning to feel less and less like 'home'. Perhaps the same will also be true of College Station.
Only time will tell...
Obviously, Niagara is 'home' for us. That's were most of our family members and many of our friends are. That's the community we grew up in, the community that invested in us and in which we invested ourselves. It's comfortable to return from an absence and we look forward to being back.
But in some ways, Niagara is no longer 'home'. We've lived here for a year now; a year of developing a routine, a year of finding a comfort zone, a year of forming ties to a community, a year of building relationships, a year of creating a 'home'. In many ways, this has become 'home' for us. And although we look forward to leaving periodically (just as we did when living in St. Catharines), we also look forward to returning from an absence.
This is the place where we feel purposeful and Niagara is a place where others have been purposeful without us. This is the place where we've experienced significant growth and Niagara is a place where others have experienced significant growth without us. But changing 'homes' doesn't happen so easily. One home doesn't seem to replace another; College Station could never 'replace' Niagara. It's more like we're accumulating 'homes'.
But, in some other sense, it seems like we might be shedding 'homes'. The longer we are away from Niagara, the deeper into 'home' limbo it moves. What I mean is, Niagara will always be 'home' in some sense, but in another sense, it's beginning to feel less and less like 'home'. Perhaps the same will also be true of College Station.
Only time will tell...
posted by David Wiens at 11:50 a.m.
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home